I messed up

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Thanks to my stupidity n anxiety I messed up my things with him

I respect his feelings but now it all feels like I said things which made him feel b

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Ur 1 msg makes me happy at times but you knw wat I can't always ask u to do these basic things for me....the basics is it alot to ask for....I am busy most of the times too but for you I can spare a moment to ask you how ur life is going...n I can't even blame you for not asking about my day or feelings ever...I deleted the messages bcuz it feels bad everytime I say smth u just never reply to that n avoid...I love you is it this difficult...I have realised while writing a letter for you the other day...you will not get time to read that either...I won't ever send u that...n yes I wrote this long msg as I am feeling really bad right now...I wonder is it all bcuz I love you n I just cannot do nything abt it or fact that u knw it... people usually make efforts for the person they love right? Why is it different in my case....either clearly I am not the one for you or u have sombdy else in ur mind.
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